I refuse
I refuse to give up my dream, I refuse to deny my promise from God. I refuse to become weak in my faith. I refuse to lose hope for what I see in my life.
I'm at what I'll refer to as my "bite me" juncture in my journey of Being Enough. I refer to it as this because the night before my first half marathon, a speaker told us that halfway though our run, our legs would tire, our backs would hurt and our minds would be done. You get to the point where you look at the person in front of you and all you can think of is "bite me!". You want to just walk off the course and be finished, you are tired of fighting fatigue, you've hit a wall. (this was geared more towards the full marathon runners but since I wasn't in the best shape, I knew she was also speaking to me)
As you are in this negative frame of mind, you look up and see people, your "fans" cheering on the sidelines, holding signs of uplifting quotes, photos of loved ones who you are running for, they shout your name and yell "You've got this, keep going". A renewed energy rains over you. You start to understand that you aren't running this race only for yourself, you are running for the ones who can't run beside you. The ones who are too weak, too young, too hurt. The ones who aren't here, who have finished their life race and are cheering us on from the world to come.
My race isn't over, it never will be and I am very aware of this. I understand that every day, I have something new to learn, new to teach, new to share. I can't take a break because it's not just me, it's my family, my loved ones, my friends, I'm in this race for them as well.
Your journey is yours to navigate, to run, walk and sometimes crawl because that's the most we can give. It's in those bite me moments that you need to look up and realize that you aren't alone, you have your fans cheering you on, you have your purpose of running, you have your loved ones praying and speaking positive affirmation in your direction.
I'm putting back on my running shoes and having faith and trust that this race will be the most rewarding ever. I refuse to give up. I'm praying circles around this wall and I thank God for it crumbling down.
I'm at what I'll refer to as my "bite me" juncture in my journey of Being Enough. I refer to it as this because the night before my first half marathon, a speaker told us that halfway though our run, our legs would tire, our backs would hurt and our minds would be done. You get to the point where you look at the person in front of you and all you can think of is "bite me!". You want to just walk off the course and be finished, you are tired of fighting fatigue, you've hit a wall. (this was geared more towards the full marathon runners but since I wasn't in the best shape, I knew she was also speaking to me)
As you are in this negative frame of mind, you look up and see people, your "fans" cheering on the sidelines, holding signs of uplifting quotes, photos of loved ones who you are running for, they shout your name and yell "You've got this, keep going". A renewed energy rains over you. You start to understand that you aren't running this race only for yourself, you are running for the ones who can't run beside you. The ones who are too weak, too young, too hurt. The ones who aren't here, who have finished their life race and are cheering us on from the world to come.
My race isn't over, it never will be and I am very aware of this. I understand that every day, I have something new to learn, new to teach, new to share. I can't take a break because it's not just me, it's my family, my loved ones, my friends, I'm in this race for them as well.
Your journey is yours to navigate, to run, walk and sometimes crawl because that's the most we can give. It's in those bite me moments that you need to look up and realize that you aren't alone, you have your fans cheering you on, you have your purpose of running, you have your loved ones praying and speaking positive affirmation in your direction.
I'm putting back on my running shoes and having faith and trust that this race will be the most rewarding ever. I refuse to give up. I'm praying circles around this wall and I thank God for it crumbling down.
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