Patience
My alarm went off at 4:35AM this morning, I immediately jumped out of bed and headed to the kitchen for my morning coffee. As I was standing there, waiting for the water, I suddenly felt hot, clammy and faint, knowing what it was, I squatted and put my head between my knees. My blood sugar had dropped and I was crashing big time. Had I waited in bed for 5 mins, this wouldn't have happened, yet I didn't have time to wait. I needed to get coffee in me, needed to get dressed, needed to get out the door by 5. I had no time to be patient on my body, I HAD to get going NOW!!
Story of my life, I call it the microwave syndrome, wanting everything to happen now. I'd like to say it's not my fault, that it's the generation I am part of....maybe a little true, yet.....no, not really. It's just me, I have really never had patience. I get antsy waiting in line at the grocery store, car pool line, being on hold, even at red lights. ugh, I don't like waiting!
Today, I was tested in the patience dept, the next 3 weeks will test me even more. My Mom had surgery today that lasted a good 7 hours, add the two hours of pre opp and it's been a very long day. I waited with my Dad, sitting and chitchatting, sitting and watching a movie, sitting and reading, eating and waiting. I wanted to scream by the time the Dr came out to tell us that everything was ok, never wanting to show my Dad how anxious I truly was. I did it, I waited patiently, knowing that someone else was depending on me to be the strong one.
I have been guided to be still and wait, to trust and to be patient. I have read emails, articles, blogs and books, learning how to be still inside and out. I'm not an expert by any stretch of the imagination, actually, I still kinda suck at it but I know, if someone else is depending on me to be strong and patient, it is possible and I am capable enough to do it. I will be patient.
Story of my life, I call it the microwave syndrome, wanting everything to happen now. I'd like to say it's not my fault, that it's the generation I am part of....maybe a little true, yet.....no, not really. It's just me, I have really never had patience. I get antsy waiting in line at the grocery store, car pool line, being on hold, even at red lights. ugh, I don't like waiting!
Today, I was tested in the patience dept, the next 3 weeks will test me even more. My Mom had surgery today that lasted a good 7 hours, add the two hours of pre opp and it's been a very long day. I waited with my Dad, sitting and chitchatting, sitting and watching a movie, sitting and reading, eating and waiting. I wanted to scream by the time the Dr came out to tell us that everything was ok, never wanting to show my Dad how anxious I truly was. I did it, I waited patiently, knowing that someone else was depending on me to be the strong one.
I have been guided to be still and wait, to trust and to be patient. I have read emails, articles, blogs and books, learning how to be still inside and out. I'm not an expert by any stretch of the imagination, actually, I still kinda suck at it but I know, if someone else is depending on me to be strong and patient, it is possible and I am capable enough to do it. I will be patient.
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