Ask and ye shall receive
I have a really hard time asking for help. I'd rather struggle, fight with it and pretty much torture myself instead of asking someone for help. I mean seriously, I can do it myself and I usually get the job done, eventually. It's far from perfect yet I am perfectly happy because I take pride and ownership in "doing it myself ".
I'll tell you two great examples both happened this week. The garbage disposal has been out of sorts for a little over 2 weeks, leaking water and ground up whatever someone chose to not consume (aka waste). My daughter had to clean up one such mess after realizing the cabinet under the sink was completely flooded, and I wasn't there to fix it. Last week while I was running the garbage disposal I noticed the floor under the sink seemed to be moist. I opened up the cabinet doors to nasty ground up food and water being spat in my face. Such fun. I tightened and messed with it and thought I had fixed the problem...haha, not even. Yesterday morning I once again noticed the floor was damp and oh damnit, it has to be fixed. Being my stubborn self, I cleared out the cabinet, crawled under the sink and just laid there. I was lost, I didn't even know where to begin. The garbage disposal didn't plug into an outlet, it was hardwired and I couldn't take the back panel off because it's not removable!!! So, I called a friend. He immediately offered to drive to my house take it out, go get a new one replace it. He said it was easy, he could do it in no time. Besides, it would be nice to see me again, we hadn't seen each other in a while. But I wanted to do it myself. No, I told him, sounding like a bratty 3 year old, "I want to do it myself!". "But really, it's no trouble" "NO! I have to do it myself " His reply was simply "what is wrong with you?" (Said in man tone) At this, I started bawling, ha ha, stupid question to ask a hormonal, 46 year old, recently single lady whose garbage disposal doesn't work, the back door is broken, the lights on the garage are fried and the garage doors keep getting stuck. "I HAVE TO LEARN TO DO THINGS FOR MYSELF!!!" I yelled through the phone. I think he heard me that time, as well as our neighbors and the people 2 blocks down. I was pissed, I wasn't asking for help, all I wanted was guidance. He calmed me down, talked me off of the roof and watching every word he spoke, guided me as I removed the old garbage disposal. I went and bought a new, ordered dinner for the boys, picked it up, got home, changed into sweatpants and got to work as a plumber. And YES, I kept my plumbers butt in check, didn't need to clean up vomit from my boys if they, heaven forbid, saw mama's ass Crack. I hardwired that sucker in, hooked up every pipe, got it ready to be mounted and realized, my arms were too weak and I was unable to do it. I tried 4 or 5 times to lift it up and twist it and every time my arms started to shake it all I could see was the garbage disposal smashing my face and yet another ER visit because I'm a clutz, so, that's when I decided to ask for help. I yelled for my 18 yr old who with one try, got that dang thing mounted and ready to run. Woohoo, job well done.....until this morning.
I open the dishwasher to clean sparkling dishes and started to unload, I heard sound of water splashing and I look down, there at the bottom of the dishwasher was all of the dirty water and soap. It had not drained, suddenly I was in a panic and ripped open the cabinet doors. Phew thank God it was dry, but what the hell? And then it dawned on me, two little sections that I overlooked in the directions, talking about hooking up the dishwasher to the garbage disposal. What is that all about? I had no idea that you had to hook up the washerror to the disposal. Ugh, that means disconnecting unassembling just for one little stupid major thing. Luckily, I was able to punch out the little hole without disassembling or unmounting anything except one hose, hooked it up and everything is okay now.
Yesterday, I learned my lesson and so today, I asked for help. We have a weight machine that's been sitting in the basement for the five years that I've lived here, collecting dust in the storage closet. I decided yesterday it was time to get that thing out and start working these weak skinny Arms o' Mine. My friend Paul (who works at a gym) offered to help and without hesitation I accepted. You see, over the past year or so, Paul has witnessed my stubborn attitude and calls me out on it, telling me that asking for help is ok, everyone has to at some point. After years of "I am woman, hear me roar", I decided a quiet purr was in order and because of that, no one will injure themselves using the weight machine. I knew my limit and my ability.....I knew I needed help. Tomorrow I might actually use it, we'll see.
Asking for help is not a sign of weakness, it's actually a sign of strength. You are strong enough to know your limitations. You are strong enough to recognize that you don't have all of the answers. You are strong enough to be humble and ask for help. You are strong enough to to know it's ok to not always be strong enough.
I'll tell you two great examples both happened this week. The garbage disposal has been out of sorts for a little over 2 weeks, leaking water and ground up whatever someone chose to not consume (aka waste). My daughter had to clean up one such mess after realizing the cabinet under the sink was completely flooded, and I wasn't there to fix it. Last week while I was running the garbage disposal I noticed the floor under the sink seemed to be moist. I opened up the cabinet doors to nasty ground up food and water being spat in my face. Such fun. I tightened and messed with it and thought I had fixed the problem...haha, not even. Yesterday morning I once again noticed the floor was damp and oh damnit, it has to be fixed. Being my stubborn self, I cleared out the cabinet, crawled under the sink and just laid there. I was lost, I didn't even know where to begin. The garbage disposal didn't plug into an outlet, it was hardwired and I couldn't take the back panel off because it's not removable!!! So, I called a friend. He immediately offered to drive to my house take it out, go get a new one replace it. He said it was easy, he could do it in no time. Besides, it would be nice to see me again, we hadn't seen each other in a while. But I wanted to do it myself. No, I told him, sounding like a bratty 3 year old, "I want to do it myself!". "But really, it's no trouble" "NO! I have to do it myself " His reply was simply "what is wrong with you?" (Said in man tone) At this, I started bawling, ha ha, stupid question to ask a hormonal, 46 year old, recently single lady whose garbage disposal doesn't work, the back door is broken, the lights on the garage are fried and the garage doors keep getting stuck. "I HAVE TO LEARN TO DO THINGS FOR MYSELF!!!" I yelled through the phone. I think he heard me that time, as well as our neighbors and the people 2 blocks down. I was pissed, I wasn't asking for help, all I wanted was guidance. He calmed me down, talked me off of the roof and watching every word he spoke, guided me as I removed the old garbage disposal. I went and bought a new, ordered dinner for the boys, picked it up, got home, changed into sweatpants and got to work as a plumber. And YES, I kept my plumbers butt in check, didn't need to clean up vomit from my boys if they, heaven forbid, saw mama's ass Crack. I hardwired that sucker in, hooked up every pipe, got it ready to be mounted and realized, my arms were too weak and I was unable to do it. I tried 4 or 5 times to lift it up and twist it and every time my arms started to shake it all I could see was the garbage disposal smashing my face and yet another ER visit because I'm a clutz, so, that's when I decided to ask for help. I yelled for my 18 yr old who with one try, got that dang thing mounted and ready to run. Woohoo, job well done.....until this morning.
I open the dishwasher to clean sparkling dishes and started to unload, I heard sound of water splashing and I look down, there at the bottom of the dishwasher was all of the dirty water and soap. It had not drained, suddenly I was in a panic and ripped open the cabinet doors. Phew thank God it was dry, but what the hell? And then it dawned on me, two little sections that I overlooked in the directions, talking about hooking up the dishwasher to the garbage disposal. What is that all about? I had no idea that you had to hook up the washerror to the disposal. Ugh, that means disconnecting unassembling just for one little stupid major thing. Luckily, I was able to punch out the little hole without disassembling or unmounting anything except one hose, hooked it up and everything is okay now.
Yesterday, I learned my lesson and so today, I asked for help. We have a weight machine that's been sitting in the basement for the five years that I've lived here, collecting dust in the storage closet. I decided yesterday it was time to get that thing out and start working these weak skinny Arms o' Mine. My friend Paul (who works at a gym) offered to help and without hesitation I accepted. You see, over the past year or so, Paul has witnessed my stubborn attitude and calls me out on it, telling me that asking for help is ok, everyone has to at some point. After years of "I am woman, hear me roar", I decided a quiet purr was in order and because of that, no one will injure themselves using the weight machine. I knew my limit and my ability.....I knew I needed help. Tomorrow I might actually use it, we'll see.
Asking for help is not a sign of weakness, it's actually a sign of strength. You are strong enough to know your limitations. You are strong enough to recognize that you don't have all of the answers. You are strong enough to be humble and ask for help. You are strong enough to to know it's ok to not always be strong enough.
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